This 2 weeks have been a great, depressing and worrisome experience to me. I dont really know where to start but seems like its becoming harder and harder for me to continue living as a human being in this world. Maybe this is one of the great test that Allah S.W.T wants me to experience.
All of this time, I’ve only heard about divorce cases only in newspaper, from friends, internet and etc. I’ve never imagined that there will come a day where I’m actually involved in dealing with this divorce thing. The couple is so dearest to me that I cant never imagined that they wanted to get divorce. I’ve tried thinking of a lot of idea to make they get back together but it all seems so blur to me now. Is divorce is reallly the way out? I’m kind of confuse. For as long as I’ll live in this world I’ll always instill in my mind that marriage is a holy thing in which once you commit yourself to the relationship, no matter how hard it is, no matter how you suffer or no matter what you do, we need to keep the marriage. But living in this world is not as ideal as what I always thought. Otherwise there would be no divorces stated in Islam and there would be no divorces cases happen around the world. Having said that, even the couple who is dearest to me is at edge of their relationship, I promise myself that I would do anything to get them back together. I love to see when we’re all happy together again. Although things have become more messy and difficult at this time, as much as possible, I dont want it to end up in the worst possible way, divorce.
Work which has been always been interesting to me now giving me more and more pressure as I serve more years in Petronas. The new scheme that they introduce looks like a good venue to develop the staff but in a way, is a double edge sword. At this point of time there is nothing I could do but to follow the programme that has been set. I’ve to attend coaching session for a total of 100hrs, make several note for file, present various proposal, carry out software analysis which some I haven’t even started anything on it, that is on top of what I’m doing now. Just imagined, the load of work I have to carry out. Having said that, I guess I just have to do it. Take things little by little and if Allah permits I probably can manage it.
The only happy things that happen to me in the last week is it marks my first day going out to watch a movie in cinema with a girl. Frankly speaking, after knowing her for quite sometimes, she looks like a great package to me. Its so hard to believe that a girl like that which is cute and baik2 still tadek bf lagi. Although I did ask her
Me: Ade org marah gil(bkn nama sebenar) tak keluar dgn saya nie?
Gil: Takde
Me: Abis tu cincin yang kat tangan tu?
Gil: Cincin tu mak yang bagi
Even now, I still dont believe that she is still single. But having said that, I always believe what we do in the relationship will determine the outcome. For the time being, I’ll just go with the flow.
There are too many things to handle in one time and I dont know whether I could make it. Only Allah is the best listener and at this point of time, getting closer to Allah is the best thing I could do. Praying is definitely giving me strength to continue with this struggle. Hopefully everything will end up good.
